By Suresh Unnithan
In the good old days, Kerala’s assembly elections were a glorious ideological spectacle. Reds versus Blues, saffron versus sickle-and-hammer, each side hurling abuses like confetti at a wedding nobody wanted. “Fascists!” screamed the Left. “Communist devils!” roared the Congress. BJP called everyone anti-national, and everyone called BJP the RSS in disguise. Pure, unadulterated hatred. Beautiful. Now? It’s a mite market. Denied a ticket? No problem. Just walk across the road, swap your red shirt for a white kurta or saffron stole, and suddenly yesterday’s mortal enemy is your new “ideological soulmate.” Welcome to 2026 Kerala – where politics isn’t about principles anymore; it’s about the ticket counter. Cash on delivery, ideology not included.
Take Sandeep Varier, the erstwhile BJP warrior (yes, the name practically begs for satire). For years this nobleman was the saffron brigade’s favourite attack dog in Kerala. Congress? “Corrupt family dynasty!” LDF? “Godless traitors selling the state to China!” He shouted with such conviction you’d think he was born with a lotus in his mouth. Then the Kerala BJP leadership – those “clerical staff” who take orders from Delhi – denied him a ticket. Poof! Ideology evaporated faster than a toddy shop’s profit on election day. Sandeep promptly jumped over to Congress, the very party he once accused of every sin in the Manusmriti and the Communist Manifesto combined. Today he’s their star recruit, smiling like a groom who just discovered his dowry includes a free seat in the front row. From “saffron warrior” to Congress coolie in one ticket rejection. The man who once called Congress “the party of looters” now queues up for their nomination form. What a flexible spine! Yoga instructors should study him.
But Sandeep is small fry. Enter the real comedy gold: veteran CPI(M) heavyweight G Sudhakaran. Sixty-three years in the red bastion. Former minister. Clean image. The kind of comrade who could make even EMS Namboodiripad nod approvingly from heaven. Denied a ticket in 2021? Dropped from the state committee? The party that taught him to chant “Inquilab Zindabad” suddenly treated him like an expired ration card. So what does a 63-year Communist do? He quits the CPI(M), announces he’ll contest as an “independent” from Ambalappuzha, and insists he’s still “committed to Communist ideology.” Sure, comrade. Just like a man who divorces his wife but keeps her surname and demands alimony. Independent? We all know what that means in Kerala code language – waiting for the UDF to offer him a lifeboat. Sixty-three years of red blood, sweat and sickle, traded for one green signal from the Congress high command. Ideology? That was yesterday’s newspaper. Today it’s pure commercial calculation: “If the party won’t give me a seat, I’ll shop elsewhere.”
And then there’s the queen of the ticket bazaar herself – three-time CPI(M) MLA Aisha Potty. The giant killer from Kottarakkara who once humbled Kerala Congress stalwarts with pure Left muscle. She built her career brick by red brick, defeating big names, waving the red flag like it was her family heirloom. Denied a ticket in 2021 under that convenient “two-term rule”? No sulking in the corner for her. In January 2026 she marched straight into Congress, got welcomed with garlands thicker than her old party flag, and is now the UDF candidate from the very seat she once won for the CPM. The same Congress she and her comrades spent decades calling “bourgeois reactionaries” and “imperialist stooges.” Today? Besties. The party that once fielded her against Congress now fields her for Congress. Aisha Potty didn’t just switch sides; she did a full ideological somersault and landed perfectly on the Congress ticket. Meanwhile, actual Congress loyalist R Reshmi, who contested the seat in 2021, got so disgusted she joined the BJP. Irony so thick you could spread it on appam.
The market is booming. CPI MLA C Mukundan, denied a second term, promptly threatens to go independent or worse – straight to BJP – and accuses his own party of “selling seats.” Selling! Like vegetables in Chalai market. Revolt brews. Ex-ministers, sitting MLAs, district secretaries – all suddenly discovering that the party they bled for is “undemocratic” the moment the ticket machine rejects them. Yesterday they called Congress “the party of capitalists”; today they’re queuing for capitalist tickets. Yesterday BJP was “communal poison”; today some are ready to drink it if it comes with a nomination letter. Principles? Those are for the poor cadres who still slog in the sun without AC cars or ministerial bungalows.
This isn’t politics; it’s pure commerce. A ticket is now the ultimate IPO – Initial Political Offering. Denied by one company? Switch to the rival firm, rebrand your ideology overnight, and launch the new product called “I was always secretly with you.” No qualms, no guilt, no shame. The leaders who once used the most derogatory abuses – “traitor,” “opportunist,” “power-hungry rat” – are now the biggest opportunists themselves. They didn’t just compromise ideology; they auctioned it on OLX: “Slightly used ideology, good condition, works with any party. Best offer gets the candidate.”
Voters of Kerala, beware. These turncoats aren’t fighting for you; they’re fighting for their own political pensions. The election isn’t Left versus Right anymore. It’s Ticket versus No-Ticket. Ideology has left the building, and in its place sits a shiny new cash register. The so-called warriors, comrades and progressives have all become the same thing: ticket touts in designer kurtas. Next time you see one of these chameleons on stage hugging yesterday’s enemy, just remember – they didn’t change their mind. They just changed their price tag.
